Heck No Pooh's Adventures
Month
http://poohadventures.wikia.com/wiki/Pooh%27s_Adventures_of_2001:_A_Space_Odyssey
So I’m kind of drunk at the moment, and I decided to finally go and vandalize the Pooh’s Adventures wiki with that 2001 thing I mentioned a few weeks ago. Go take a look at it before the mods take it down and/or send me poorly-capitalized death threats.
PoohMod: They erased it, so click Read More for what used to be there. Spoilers, obviously.
Because a lot of them have weak grammar, unsurprisingly.
Because it’s on the main page of the Wiki I guess.
Allright i’ll Ignore what you Say and I Hope you’ll Ignore My Friends Too YOU HEAR ME? YOU WILL IGNORE US
PoohMod: Please do ignore us, and for God’s sake ignore the criticism your videos are getting. Take criticism, please. After all, you’re dealing with a 20 year old here.
Rules? Heres a Rule for you THIS PLACE GETS TURNED OFF (Pushes heckNo Pooh Guy Off)
PoohMod: It won’t turn off, no matter how hard your scripted actions try. Just let us have fun.
and if you Think I Should Ignore you then How About you Ignore Me and My Friends.
PoohMod: Just ignore us already. People don’t give a crap when the likes of Encyclopedia Dramatica trashes on them, and neither should you.
First of all you See im Not Selfish and im Not a Nosepicker im Trying to Ask you a Reason why This Evilness your doing Just Needs to end.
PoohMod: You may not be a nosepicker, and I realise that now, but there is strong evidence of your selfishness on every page of this blog’s “Reese” tag. Unfortunately, your knowledge isn’t good enough to know that. We will end this “evilness” if you IGNORE US AND LEARN WHAT YOU’RE DOING WRONG IN YOUR CROSSOVERS.
I Saw that Vid LeoFan Made and About Those Suggestions Were Not Gonna Follow Them it Would’ve Happened Before the Series Started But No it’s Too Late.
PoohMod: Reese, do you realise how selfish you are being?
PoohMod is Max. Reese is “reeseandnumbuh5” and doesn’t yet know how to use the Ask page.
What Reese should do is tell them about the trouble he’s getting. They’ll have better advice for him than to try and come back at the bullies.
Actually I Lied to you im Not Doing your Orders you Bald-Troublemaker
PoohMod: I know you were, you trouble-taker. Now prepare for 10,000 years of non-stop trolling, because if you want to remain a sad, troubled man for as long as you live, with us and potentially hundreds of others giving you shit about your poorly made crossovers, inflated egotism and disturbing obsessions, then that’s perfectly fine by me. You’re asking for all this hate. All these mockeries, all these piss-takes, all these immature death threats. You have no idea what you’re getting yourself into with the crap you say. You’re just making yourself look like a bigger asshole than me and most of my blog’s supporters.
What I’m trying to say is that ignorance is bliss. Me, I’ll never shut down this blog because I’m not going to ignore the lack of effort that goes into these crossovers, but if you leave us alone, we’ll leave you alone, and then you can live a long, happy life. If you don’t, then you’re finding many excuses to make yourself miserable, and nobody likes being miserable. It’s a war you can’t win, buddy. So, ready for the next round?
Okay Okay i’ll Accecpt the Offer.
PoohMod:
External image
What?…No you Wouldn’t Dare you Can’t Do this!!
PoohMod: If you didn’t refuse then this argument wouldn’t carry on. Perhaps you didn’t read the parts about stopping a fight; by refusing my kind offer you’re asking for trouble.
Hmmm Let me Think…..Nope Never Sorry.
PoohMod: You still want your life to be a living hell until the day you die, huh?
Oh no Thank you I Know What your Up Too.
PoohMod: I know your series has fans, and popular Adventure creator Benny J. Ross doesn’t like to disappoint his fans either. But he didn’t want to spend the rest of his life in a fight. He’s a kind enough guy once you get to know him (and that’s coming from me), and to make sure he doesn’t end up in any kind of fight, he gave up on crossovers and focused on more original projects.
If you focus on original projects, not putting a gigantic cast of cartoon characters into Planet of the Apes and spoiling artistic and moral integrity, then we will leave you alone and your life will be happy. Sure you may have disappointed the people that like cheap crossovers, but please, be like Benny. Be brave. That way, we will respect you and this thousand-year fight will come to an end.
What if we could work Things out and Be Friends and Never Fight and Have our films Reviewed in a Nice Way Why Can’t we All Just…Get along but if you Hate Them Ignore Them.
PoohMod: Hmmmmm…
…
…How about I make a deal with you?
on the Other Hand I Can make a Deal with you.
PoohMod: I’m listening/reading.
I See Mr HeckNoGuy or Whoever the Hell you Are will Put an End to This Reviewing Forever I Mean come on Isn’t the Internet Big Enough for the Both of us? why are you Even Doing This to us Anyways?
PoohMod: Is the internet big enough for both of us, you say?
Don’t you Idiots Know that I Didn’t Co-Direct the Headless Horseman of Hallloween with Yakko? I Just Gave Him Ideas for it and I Don’t Know what Waifu Means But whatever it is it Needs to Stop im Still Not Breaking up with Numbuh 5 and even if you Try to Get me to do it it’ll Take a Thousand Years.
PoohMod: I didn’t say you co-directed it (Well, I did at one point but that was a goof-up), I just know you contributed ideas to it. Also, “waifu” is Engrish for “wife” but is widely used when someone masturbates to a fictional female and treats her like she is real. Case in point: you and Numbuh 5, a relationship that seems to be pedophilia considering the ages of you and her. You want to spark new life into the world? Have sex with a real girl.
Hell, there is a guy who married a plush doll of Twilight Sparkle and faced thousands upon thousands of people seeing him as insane. I know you’re never going to break up with your waifu and you are going to call us people “idiots” when your grammar is abysmal and your obsession over a character from a show that ended five years ago is unhealthier than aspartame - just keep on defending your relationship with a 10-year-old, hand-drawn being and you’ll get the same treatment as Twilight’s husbando for as long as it takes for us to pick on you.
Ever wondered why Resse’s waifu is Numbah 5? Well, I know. It’s a long story. It all started, in a Pooh’s Adventure Christmas Triple Feature.
http://www.wenoo.net/video/0629f8a4ab6477642b5 (Poky Little Puppy’s First Christmas)
http://www.wenoo.net/video/fc59624a18663b8d4d2 (Poky’s Xmas Part 2)
http://www.wenoo.net/video/a75ed441ffce412a0a1 (Rest of PLP’s Holiday and this is when it get’s juicy.)
http://www.wenoo.net/video/bd98b54e57a1ad89d12 (Rest of KND special and A Christmas Story?)
http://www.wenoo.net/video/659f8c3776aaf1f8efd (No more stuff in here.)
http://www.wenoo.net/video/96bf73e7858cea114e1
Other highlights include the villains joining the good guys just because “It’s Christmas.”, and Ducky marrying a character from “Dink the Little Dinosaur” (This replaces the Jetta/Little Godzilla relationship from that Happy Days crossover).
The one whose waifu is underage and animated.
Thomas and Twilight Sparkle’s Adventures of the Annoying Orange.
Possible.
I would if not only part 2 survived.
Godzilla.
Because neither he or Yakko have any clue how long their videos are, that’s all I know.
Yet that wouldn’t work because only one page says negative things about a real person.
Anything based on video games.
Pooh’s Adventures of Happy Days.
It wouldn’t quite be the same as another format.
EMILY OLSON PRODUCTIONS PRESENTS….
A MIYA PARKER PRODUCTION……
Pooh’s Adventures of The Adventures of Ian!
Starring Pooh’s 1,000 friends!
- cue Pooh’s Adventures opening which I didn’t give a damn about so I didn’t write it -
It was a normal day on Feralheart Island and at the Bonfire Island Analyzer ( BFIA ) Headquarters. The door opened as the silver cheetah with ints, Mystico, entered holding a book. “Hey, Nick! Guess what!” The primarily blue wolf with a dark brown mane spun around in his desk, still looking into a weird telescope, appearing to be studying the TLKer Drama at Bonfire. “I got an invitation t-” Andy ran over to take a look, “Pooh’s…. ADVENTURES!?!?!?!?!?? What in the motherfriggin’ hell? Mystico, you’re smarter than that! They’ve screwed up history 5000 million times!” Nick walked over, “Just lemme have a look here…” He opened the book and began reading through the rules, requirements, etc. “Signed by… Winnie the Pooh, Tigger, Piglet, Owl, Rabbit, Kanga, Roo, Gopher, Littlefoot, Simba, Timon, Pumbaa, Nala,……….”
- 500 HOURS LATER -
“….Turdie F. Bastard, and…. EMILY OL- WHA!?!?!?!?!?” Nick dropped the book in surprise, “EMILY’S INVOLVED IN THIS? WHAT THE HELL IS SHE SMOKING!?!?!?!? HOW DID SHE GET INVOLVED!?!?!?!?” Mystico shrugged, “Weird things happen! I’m pretty sure they’re just parodies though…. anyways, give me a black-tipped pen, I need to sign this.” Nick threw a pen at Mystico, “Here, sign it.” Mystico signed his name and then threw it back to the wolf/fox hybrid, “Now you sign it.” Nick yelled, “HELL TO THE NAW! I AM NOT SCREWING UP HISTORY, NOPE NEVER! Wait… ANDY NO DROP THE PEN.” Nick face pawed, “It’s too late.” Andy had signed the Pooh’s Adventures deal. “Fine, I guess I’m going too. Say, am I going to meet my alternate self who is somehow related to Castiel and Jack Spicer?” “What the fuck!?!?!?!?” Mystico yelled. “Never mind, that’s a story for later!” Nick felt his paws quivering as he signed his name upon the sheet: “Nick A. Swagger-Uhas” which began his deal with Pooh’s Adventures. Mystico grabbed the duo by their paws, “Well, let’s go!” He then shot off into the distance to the Pooh’s Adventures hideout.
MEANWHILE IN CARTOONLAND……
In the Pooh’s Adventures Hideout, the cartoons had just finished reviewing The Adventures of Ian. “So, how was it?” asked Nicholas, the suggester. “Nicholas, what are you SMOKING?” Castor yelled, throwing his notebook down. “That movie was R! R I TELL YOU, R-RATED! Nicholas shrugged, “No one told me, it looked like a PG film to me!” “Whoa, calm down.” A voice said. Mickey Mouse stepped out. “We can do this. All we need to do is make the characters speak in subtitles, and… maybe we should satisfy an older audience, and leave in everything except the rape references. Plus, let’s make lots of the characters cousins to completely, unrelated characters! Sounds like a plan?” Mystico nodded, “Yes, I agree.” Every other cartoon nodded. “Well anyways, let’s GOOOOOOOO!” The cartoons dashed off to LA.
Christopher Robin appeared on the screen, telling the cartoons to be quiet. He cleared his throat, “And now we begin our adventure, which is called…” He held up a book with the original title and the picture of Piglet crossed out that now read “Pooh’s Adventures of The Adventures of Ian” Piglet popped out, “Me?” Christopher looked confused, “What are you talking about? Well anyways, act 1, our story begins!”
So while I am still trying to think of other chapters for Winnie the Pooh in Fantasmic! (WTF Edition) and try not to make it lame, I should let you know something. Namely, this isn’t the first time I’ve tackled on this rodeo of madness and misused clips. Inspired by Psyga 315’s liveblogs, I’ve liveblogged one of the Pooh’s Adventures stories in the past, namely Pooh’s Adventures of Turbo: A Power Rangers Movie. And called it “the weirdest teamup this side of “Trakeena’s Revenge” (the so-bad-it’s-good Lightspeed Rescue/Lost Galaxy team-up, mind).
Coincidentally or not, it was also the first time I made a crossover, myself, though it wasn’t as arc-heavy.
There comes a time when a crossover is so odd and baffling, that even a retired reviewer like myself feels the need to head back into battle one last time. I feel like one of those veteran Kamen Riders in the Neo-Heisei era. Yeah, I hung up my reviewing stick and declare that I wasn’t gonna review more Pooh’s Adventures, but there are times where I have to fight one last battle. In short: “Just when I thought I was out, they pull me back in.”
The crossover I’m reviewing is yet another Pooh’s Adventures. Pooh’s Adventures of Star Wars: Darth Maul Story. Apparently Darth Maul was so badass, he got his own spinoff show. All joking aside, when I saw Yu-Gi-Oh characters in this video (amazing that you can tell what anime is what just from the art style), I knew this had to be the work of the creator of the “Quest for the Fang Blades” Pooh’s Adventures spin-off, in which Pooh decides to join Ichigo Kurosaki in what some people consider the longest arc in Shonen history. Yes. Longer than Namek.
What are we waiting for? Let’s just see how awesome or bad this story gets!
Thinking of the Pooh’s Adventures series in the past, while I was browsing through the newest anti-Pooh’s Adventures Wiki, I glanced at the people who made it.
Now, I’m not sure if it has been mentioned, but I do remember one name in particular: BowserMovies1989, and I don’t know if he’s the one who started it all, but…yeah, considering that he’s the one who has been one of the most prolific people out there with the Pooh’s Adventures thing…
Looking at the parodies of the Pooh’s Adventures phenomenon (even one written by a certain Psyga315), I honestly thought one thing. “How can you make a Pooh’s Adventures parody while going crazy with it?” And considering that even the canon Pooh’s Adventures break their own rules more than once, I’ve decided to try my own hand at a parody.
…this might get rough, so I do apologize in advance for it.
Also, with this fanfic, it isn’t canon to any of the Pooh’s Adventures series. It is, however, canon to the Rika Blogs-verse, set after the liveblog of Cyborg Davis. So, expect spoilers.
Finally, I do not own the characters, and no celebrities were harmed in the making of this fanfic. Also, expect the storyline to have some…creative liberties.
IM GONNA MAKE AN ANTI POOHS ADVENTURES WIKI
They’ll easily get fooled by pages that seem legit, and they still haven’t removed that DookyIKRDooky page yet.
Unfortunately though, Pooh wouldn’t get killed no matter what.
Why not?