Psyga Watches Winnie The Pooh Meets Sonic The Hedgehog
{sigh} Sonic. I remember when you were cool. When you ran at the speed of light. When you rocked out on your guitar. When you fought the robots together with your brother and sister… Wait. FUCK! My memories of Sonic were just as bad back then as they were now! But seriously, I doubt I’m a huge fan in Sonic. The fan base has a lot of bad reputation from rabid fans who think voice acting is better than game play to tons of Deviantart entries where a Sonic with orange shoes can be considered “original” on the basis that Shadow was a black Sonic despite having tons of differences beyond that.
Point is, I think I hate Sonic. If not for the piss poor handling of some of the games (even when they made a good Sonic game, expect them to fall flat in the side games) then it’d be because of the rabid fan boys and their cyclic hatred of Sonic. And if the fan boys feel generous to Sonic or Sega finally puts out a good game, then I can just point to an issue of Sonichu or an episode of Bloodshot the Hedgehog, or if I have to point out official Sonic fan fiction, Sonic X.
Though then again, I’m stuck in the past two years as that stuff hasn’t seem to pop up every now and then. It’s either because the fans have quieted down and realized that bitching at the eye colors doesn’t make the game play any better, or, and I won’t be surprised if this is the case, no one is pulling off infamous acts to add fuel to this fire.
But, my rant on Sonic as a whole will have to wait, because right now, we’re going back to before Sonic made the jump to 3D. To the days where the only time Sonic had a dark story was when he was a cartoon or drawn by Archie Comics. Today, we’re looking at the Sonic movie, in which they actually manage to be more batshit insane than the AOSTH version. And that’s saying a lot for the show that has Robotnik say penis.
Much like how Snively was at the end of the SATAM series, Sonic isn’t alone. Instead of Mecha Sonic, Knuckles, or Ixis Naugas, he is accompanied by Pooh Bear. This can only end well people. The only good news I bring is that it’s written by BowserMovies1989, whose Adventures are actually my first, and I know the roster pretty well. At least it’s not going to be a handful. Well, it will be, but not like Nemo and the Wolf. We did five paragraphs bitching about Sonic, so let’s dive right in!
