Heck No Pooh's Adventures

I recently said that I will reblog anything Thomas-related, and so, in case you weren’t aware these actually exist, I’m going to be riffing a video where he joins magical ponies on an adventure through the result of YouTubers liking just about anything. And I’m not talking just about Pooh’s Adventures, I’m talking about a webseries that has the same plot line in every episode. Fillies and gentlecolts, Thomas and Twilight Sparkle’s Adventures of Annoying Orange - Captain Blood Orange.

• 0:01 So far, it’s already stupid. Thomas is a train. Trains can only run on rails, and cannot fit into an entire kitchen.
• 0:05 You think that’s interesting? Thomas and Twilight have adventures all across the frickin’ world.
• 0:13 You and me both.
• 0:17 Okay, if they are really going to be on a boat, it would make sense for Thomas to transport inside a ferry. And yet, he won’t be able to see what is going on.
• 0:27 Okay, so it’s a supermarket. That doesn’t make any difference to the logic of this crossover!
• 0:41 Really, if they had to travel on a pirate ship, it would sink in an instant.
• 0:57 Besides, it makes more sense (but not my a mile) to use the CG trains because their mouths move.
• 1:03 And the ponies’ first appearance is nothing more than a gasping shot.
• 1:30 This is just more proof that these people would enjoy anything.
• 1:39 Aren’t they even too big to be on that ship? Give us an explanation! Did they shrink down? Is Thomas nothing more than a toy train?
• 1:53 My thoughts exactly.
• 2:06 People, this is all they’re put on the ship for. Stating the obvious and reacting. Like most other Pooh’s Adventures videos.
• 2:10 Such bad continuity. First he’s being narrated and then he’s talking with his own mouth.
• 2:34 Cummin’ Dick Cold!
• 2:37 One of the only shots that actually fits.
• 2:56 There they go again. Reacting so the fruits don’t have to!
• 3:15 He’s rolling on the rail while the fruits are on a ship on wheels, and my brain is currently bleeding.
• 3:44 Hello? They’re just playing around. Why get so wussy?
• 4:41 I do hate it when they introduce characters too late. They’re basically coming out of the blue at a time like that.
• 5:02 The Annoying Orange is free to be as unfunny as he wants. Let the dumb toddlers laugh, and stop making remarks. After all, I’ve seen people who have little kids that were disappointed by these videos.
• 5:18 That’s another reason the ponies were put in there - to replace dialogue. Oh, how I hate this.
• 5:46 Did he forget to add a subtitle?
• 6:11 Tut tut, two second “what” montage.
• 6:36 Plagiarist.
• 6:56 Misuse of “here”? Check.
• 7:07 Was he supposed to be hiding under the haypile?
• 7:17 Why are they cleaning a rock? Why are they grey?
• 7:43 At least stealing the orange’s lines will shut him up for once.
• 7:50 We could easily tell whose lines were stolen just then. Do they even think?
• 8:03 Another sign of desperation.
• 8:44 Aren’t Thomas and his friends supposed to be tied up? Why are they moving?
• 9:08 *glares to the right*
• 9:26 The suspends is killing me!
• 10:03 And what are they even doing with a bunch of talking food? Are they supposed to be toys that come to life whenever they feel like it?
• 10:49 Hey, give the human a chance. Pinkie’s party cannon is just full of confetti. Not very painful. Although this is painful to watch…
• 11:57 GPOY.

• Rabid bronyism: 
• Rabid trainerism: 
• Cameo uselessness: 
• Brain cancer: 
• Fun of using ratings beyond 5 stars: 

Overall: 6/5

-0.2/10. Once again, we get a video where any explanation of logic is absent, grammar is bad, crossovers are ridiculous, jokes are ruined and the target show is absolutely terrible. Not even the inclusion of the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man or Godzilla need this much explanation. 76859Thomas, if you’re reading this, ask me. How did a bunch of talking trains manage to fit inside a supermarket when they’re dozens of times larger than the characters they’re helping? Why do you think rainbow ponies are a good set of characters to pair with them? How did even the ponies manage to fit inside a tiny ship on a shopping cart? Are they toys, too? Did Twilight manage to shrink the entire gang?  And why the hell do you find this show funny? Next time you do make a video with Thomas the Tank Engine and Twilight Sparkle, please. Give reason.

Thought Yakko’s first opening was long? Wait until you see this.

Winnie the Pooh Goes to Hotel Mario, Part 7. Five likes and no dislikes? That’s easy for me to fix.

• 2:27 No, Rigby. He did it. He only.
• 3:06 Could this be the end of Pooh’s Adventures as we know it? One can only hope…
• 3:28 Ho ho ho hyuk hyuk!
• 3:33 *frowns and raises and eyebrow*
• 4:08 Hearing the words and reading what the creator assumes that word is makes me cringe.
• 4:14 *closes it down* :D
• 4:23 Don’t pick your nose in front of the camera, kid. You're embarrassing yourself even more than your editing skills.
• 4:31 BATMAN: Oh jeez…
• 4:45 At least he found a higher quality clip of Ttark than the last time I saw him.
• 4:53 Goodness gracious me, how many characters are there exactly?
• 5:12 Self inserts. Oh, joy.
• 5:42 Semi-colons do not work that way!

• Engrish:
• Subliminal messages:
• Irritation:
• Lack of Pooh:
• Laziness:

Overall: 5/5

0/10. A downright awful one indeed. It’s lazy, it’s a bad concept, and it’s just the longest bad YouTube Poop I’ve ever seen. Why do a Pooh’s Adventures of Hotel Mario when you can do this, this or even this? You don’t even have to try and think up a joke while you’re at it. Well, onto Pooh’s Adventures of Batman & Robin -1…

Winnie the Pooh Goes to Hotel Mario, Part 6. I can’t believe I didn’t say it earlier, but “Adventure” my ass.

• 0:04 MORDECAI: *gains a new brain cell and drops it*
• 1:15 Think of the colourblind!
• 2:15 Weird. He can’t use apostrophes but he can use “too”.
• 2:23 Couldn’t you ask what happened rather than force questions onto dialogue that doesn’t even need it?
• 2:41 RIGBY: They pinch back?
• 2:45 Poor Luigi.
• 2:51 I’m not concentrating on the added subtitles here, I’m concentrating on what Bowser’s really telling the creator to do.
• 2:59 YOU’RE NOT EVEN TRYING
• 3:08 Why did we need Mistress Nine anyway?
• 3:11 …So you married her?
• 3:27 MARIO: And you can’t because you’re not playable! Ha ha! No offence, Luigi.
• 4:38 You could’ve said that 20 seconds later.
• 5:51 Why do you have to make the subs so difficult to read?
• 6:57 RIGBY: *seven brain cells drop out of his ear*
• 7:07 And why couldn’t you make the subtitles white much earlier?
• 7:17 Bowser Jr’s not a girl!
• 7:37 I SAID YOU’RE NOT EVERY TRYING

Winnie the Pooh Goes to Hotel Mario, Part 5. This makes the Nostalgia Critic’s Let’s Play of Bart’s Nightmare look like whatever Let’s Player is perfect because I haven’t even watched much of them.

• 0:15 Excuse me, Reese, but click here.
• 1:40 Do these videos even imply that three year olds visit this site?
• 3:30 RABBIT: No, Mario, don’t eat it!
• 2:59 Strange. That level didn’t even get a commentary.
• 3:39 Someone doesn’t know much about philosophy, economy and liberalism.
• 4:09 *burps*
• 4:50 Screw Piglet and Mario, we can turn just about any character into an idiot!
• 4:57 I read that three times and it fit.
• 5:08 I’m getting Pooh’s Adventures of the Magic Voyage flashbacks!
• 5:31 Rabbit’s face is also mine.
• 6:30 “you Know im Thinking We Should Stay in a Fancy Hotel Just Like This One Day. What do you Guys” *cuts to next clip* Not even slo-mo will do any justice.
• 6:34 Pooh hasn’t even had the chance to say very much. Shouldn’t this be Tyrannosaurus Alan’s Adventures?
• 7:01 Come on, one interruption surely was enough!
• 7:49 Another example of trying too hard.
• 8:08 So, Pooh, got anything to say about Mario losing his power, you dumbass?

Winnie the Pooh Goes to Hotel Mario, Part 4. You know your crossover sucks when its only positive aspect is that it’s boring and not infuriating.

• 0:27 For a Canadian, this guy’s English is abysmal, but I wouldn’t make fun of it if he was from Quebec. Sadly though, people like this.
• 1:26 What, was the last cutscene hard to find in high quality?
• 1:32 Two missed opportunities for Luigi in a row!
• 1:44 MORDECAI: *another brain cell falls out of his ear*
• 1:49 *headdesk* Please don’t remind me of Pooh’s Adventures of Star Wars…
• 2:32 *sigh* Counting “Whao"s is going to be another drinking game, isn’t it?
• 3:58 You’re obviously cheering Mario on because you don’t do jack in these videos.
• 5:45 "Another Koopaling How M-” Hey is th- *clip ends* I don’t like this at all.
• 5:46 And yet the following clip took me longer to watch than to read.
• 6:58 And here I was expecting Mordecai to try and correct Mario’s Rolling Stones reference by saying that it’s not his cloud.
• 7:26 Stop slowing time down and let them go in immediately!
• 7:32 MORDECAI: *yet another brain cell falls out of his ear*

Winnie the Pooh Goes to Hotel Mario, Part 3. I mean, really. Who crosses over gameplay videos with clips of cartoons to tell a story? Who?

• 0:06 He even misspelled “Whoa”.
• 1:41 What’s even stupider is that there is usually at least one cartoon character interaction scene in each level.
• 1:44 *sees the Annoying Orange face* YakkoWarnerMovies is most likely jumping for joy.
• 2:44 Shut up, subtitles.
• 2:45 Mario actually wanted you to leave him be as he checked for himself.
• 3:10 The punctuation is so bad you can’t tell if Tigger’s stating the obvious, or if Rabbit actually knows. Besides, isn’t Rabbit supposed to be the smarter one?
• 4:14 Did this guy even bother to sort out his splicing skills?
• 4:15 MORDECAI: *a brain cell falls out of his ear*
• 4:22 Stop ruining the most Poop-tacular moments!
• 4:57 I still can’t believe how anyone would go as far as to say “Whao”.
• 5:01 By calling Margaret “George”, you’re ruining the chance of another successful date.
• 6:41 And the audience keeps getting stupider and stupider!
• 7:20 And the level gets interrputed for the second time.

Winnie the Pooh Goes to Hotel Mario, Part 2. The most annoying, inconsistent cutscenes ever. Oh, and did I mention that this guy claims that he got permission to do it, yet said that the video was made because Pooh’s Adventures of 1966 Batman was removed by Fox?

• 0:12 Ha ha… Hey, what? Good lord, this game really is as bad as they say!
• 1:02 Aw man, why can’t I skip these?
• 1:04 “There” misuse? Check./What, so Mordecai and Rigby aren’t video game geeks after all?
• 2:35 Oh, well, that’s natural.
• 3:58 And for some reason, he uses slo-mo longer than it takes to read the subtitle.
• 4:52 To Mario it is. With you, actually, it’s quite blue.

Oh, boy. We’ve got another double feature. I heard about this video a few days before SmartNoob89 requested it. Thanks for reminding me to tear it down! In this video, not only does a kid take on a mediocre Batman movie, but he also goes as far as to make a Pooh’s Adventure out of Hotel Mario. Yes, the whole game. The cutscenes, and the gameplay. How will a Let’s Play with cartoon characters work out? We’ll just have to wait and see. Get ready for part 1 of Winnie the Pooh Goes to Hotel Mario.

• 1:04 Even though Nintendo didn’t make Hotel Mario, he just add to add a logo in to extend the rubbish.
• 1:32 Please tell me that wasn’t customised.
• 1:52 Ever notice how many Pooh’s Adventures creators who use this intro happen to use “Spookable Pooh”?
• 1:58 Oh, of course that logo was customised. Please don’t tell me he will be making a cameo in the “story”.
• 2:05 He subtitled himself?
• 2:13 He keeps blocking his appearance behind red text. What, is he camera shy?
• 2:20 Finally, a subtitle that actually lets him see us.
• 2:28 Regular Show? You can’t survive without this kind of Windows Movie Maker crap, can you?
• 2:35 Looking at the letterbox that keeps appearing, I get the feeling that he happened to take these from other Pooh’s Adventures videos.
• 2:38 At least this is using YouTube Poop material. But even so, it’s already a very bad YouTube Poop.
• 2:54 Bingo.
• 3:25 Well, that was quick.
• 3:29 CD-I BOWSER: Wait. You’re my son?
• 3:31 Bad grammar, random Sailor Moon villain inclusion and this has seven likes. Tut tut tut…
• 3:35 CD-I BOWSER: Of course you’re not my son. You’re the son of, well, whoever that guy is!
• 3:37 REMINDER: Do not add subtitles to footage where the character is already speaking through a bubble.
• 4:00 That’s what we all love about sentence mixing - the chance of bad grammar is a lot lower.
• 4:07 “Your” misuse? Check./So you haven’t even seen George sitting near a green tyrannosaurus before?
• 4:20 Oh, come on. His lip sync didn’t even remotely fit with those words.
• 4:33 And they’re only here to say things like that.
• 4:49 Join Mario as he travels with some unrelated cartoon characters to stop Bowser, the Koopaling, Bowser Jr. Mistress Nine and Ings!
• 5:10 This is why subtitles should be white, black, or bordered.
• 5:32 Isn’t it ridiculous when not one, but two people work on a video that isn’t even well-made?
• 6:06 Shut up, Mordecai. You can’t even execute it as well as CD-i Mario.