Heck No Pooh's Adventures

Winnie the Pooh Meets Crash Bandicoot, part 6. Most of the comments on this video are someone’s own version of the story with far better English and vocabulary than any of the subtitles.

• 0:00 It could get worse - this guy could actually be clueless enough to take footage from a Let’s Play where people talk over it (without subtitles).
• 0:02 What was the point of that? What is the point of any of this?
• 0:20 You fools are all going to get pushed off of the edge.
• 0:40 Desperation…
• 1:18 Until you showed up, that is.
• 1:27 Weren’t the bats dangerous enough?
• 1:32 Next thing you know, Crash could stomp on Yoshi.
• 1:46 How can you say that when you’re going up a beanstalk?
• 2:17 That that quick of you.
• 2:26 At least Crash dying was cut out, otherwise this would be even more boring.
• 2:39 Shouldn’t you be dead?
• 3:04 Oh boy. They really are going to interrupt the bonus level.
• 3:12 It may be out of sync, but the idiots who like these videos don’t give a crap.
• 3:40 You had the chance to say that dozens of times before. And besides, they’re not apples!
• 3:54 Well, looking at that jump cut, Brock spoke too soon.

Winnie the Pooh meets Crash Bandicoot, part 5. The gang encounters the first boss. What the hell will they do to stop it? Well? What will they do?

• 0:01 In fact, it’s actually mute.
• 0:03 But where’s Fidget?
• 0:09 Forced montage of incomplete “what"s!
• 0:26 Red Ranger took all the credit, and the best you could do with the others is give one of them a background subtitle?
• 0:33 Ratigan and Fidget could do nothing but advise Pau Pau to look out. Worst supporting villains ever.
• 0:59 But what did he do besides watch?
• 1:00 Uh, Ratigan and Fidget aren’t one.
• 1:03 
• 1:07 (see 1:43, part 3)
• 1:10 Stop shooting a pile of snow and get involved.
• 1:16 Those douchebags killed Basil! The great mouse detective!
• 1:23 PEOPLE LIKE THIS.
• 1:36 Eh, Ripper Roo being Meowth’s friend is more tolerable than being his cousin.
• 1:52 Overblown reaction montage.
• 1:57 If there’s one positive I had to say for this part, it’s that Reese didn’t forget this part.
• 2:19 No, Tigger. What are you doing here?
• 2:24 Hey, it’s Reese!
• 2:39 Crash has jumped on enough bombs to know what you think he doesn’t.
• 2:55 TRANSLATION: *knocks Ripper Roo unconscious*
• 3:12 (see 0:33)
• 3:51 Hasn’t Reese ever heard of a mentally insane person before? Oh wait, he already is one.
• 4:05 Seriously?

Winnie the Pooh meets Crash Bandicoot, part 4. Well, I might not have repeated “what’s the point”, but I do have to repeat “PEOPLE LIKE THIS”. Fuck you, Reese.

• 0:12 Jeez, it sure must be a bummer for these characters to wait once at a time just to bounce on those boxes.
• 0:20 Quick? There’s still more characters waiting their turn!
• 0:36 If this happened in the actual game, Crash would be dead by now.
• 0:52 We’re not seeing you do anything but talk, so I have dobut.
• 1:32 Another case of getting excited as if Crash didn’t do it before.
• 1:44 Shouldn’t they be concerned at all that Crash hurt himself and Aku Aku died?
• 2:08 Reese, you can do better than that. Add in a screOn second thought, don’t. Just don’t.
• 2:17 If there’s a lot of characters following Crash, wouldn’t they be squished at this point?
• 2:31 And yet you didn’t use “Run, run, we gotta run”?
• 2:51 I was expecting a sigh of relief but obviously the poor kid’s lazy.
• 3:06 Unless everyone except the game characters get eaten by piranhas on the way.
• 3:34 (see 1:32)
• 4:22 What is this now, a disneyJSman video?

Comments:

• “That rolling stone reminds of the boulder chase in Indiana Jones! Can you please add Indiana Jones Rolling Stone music to the level Boulder Dash and request some Goofy Hollers and some Wilhelm screams?”
• “*mass roleplaying*”

Winnie the Pooh meets Crash Bandicoot, part 3. “This film takes Place After Winnie the pooh and ronald mcdonald`s adventures of the Super Mario Bros (1993 Movie) wich Explains Pooh and friends met Mario Luigi and Yoshi Before and ash Ketchum meets the Thief and the Cobbler wich Explains Ash and his friends Faced Zig-Zag Before” Yes, these people like the Mario movie.

• 0:00 How should he know what level it is?
• 0:13 Good thing this clip actually got a caption this time.
• 0:19 Good thing also I made a character fat in a “what” montage in my upcoming parody, because now it makes sense.
• 0:36 AAGH!
• 0:39 Old pal? You’ve been in like a thousand videos together and you claim not to have seen him in a while?
• 0:43 PEOPLE LIKE THIS.
• 0:47 It’s much better than Pooh’s Adventures.
• 1:02 You should know if they’ve ever been involved in your starring roles. That’s what YouTube Poop is all about.
• 1:06 “Well that there is pooh Piglet Tgger Rabbit Eeyore Ash Mis*cut off* PEOPLE LIKE THIS.
• 1:13 PEOPLE LIKE THIS.
• 1:21 Filler. Just plain filler.
• 1:43 If Pooh’s only helping, should this be Super Mario Meets Crash Bandicoot?
• 1:46 SPOILER ALERT: They all live.
• 1:58 You dare silence the great Vincent Price? Twice?
• 2:06 Evil laugh montage.
• 2:21 ”[“
• 2:40 PEOPLE LIKE THIS.
• 2:58 Is that the only clip of Tigger you could find? Jesus, I’m getting another flashback to The Magic Voyage.
• 3:05 It’s been a while since I last said "Desperation”.
• 3:29 Well, at least they didn’t interrupt the bonus level.

Winnie the Pooh meets Crash Bandicoot, part 2. *insert Wreck-It Ralph joke here*

• 0:00 Good thing we’re actually on a hot location at this point, but it’s not a bloody desert.
• 0:36 Something I’ve always wondered about this cliche - where’d the bath come from?
• 0:44 Skipper’s a towel, apparently.
• 0:53 Here, let me correct the grammar: “Ouch, that was some fall we had, Gay Luigi.”
• 1:04 And plenty of other times before, to be precise.
• 1:30 I’d like to imagine this is from a Power Ranger’s perspective. Still won’t keep that from being boring, though.
• 1:34 Both Yakko and Reese are so clueless about length that even the subtitles appear for longer than they should be.
• 1:41 What is the point?
• 1:52 See how no one happens to be interested enough to interrupt?
• 2:00 You could’ve said that when he first hit a crab.
• 2:16 [link]
• 2:25 So many villains here that they got in the way of Mario’s face.
• 2:29 What, weren’t any of the other villains concerning enough?
• 2:32 He was eating by crocodiles? So he won?
• 2:37 There is so little punctuation you wouldn’t know whether he’s asking a question or just copying.
• 3:02 PEOPLE LIKE THIS.
• 3:24 Good thinking, Crash.
• 3:33 Crash destroyed a bridge of crates while a bunch of Power Rangers and cartoon characters were behind him. How the hell were they able to get over?

What’s the point of watching full level gameplay not for walkthrough purposes but for some kind of movie? What is even the point of making subtitled cartoon characters interrupt gameplay footage that isn’t even yours? Case in point, Pooh’s Adventures of Epic Mickey, Benny the Beast’s Adventures of Villains’ Revenge and even worse, Winnie the Pooh Goes to Hotel Mario. As it turns out, the kid who created the latter has also turned the entire first Crash Bandicoot game into a Pooh’s Adventure, and the critics are raving like the ever-accepting dickdrinkers they are. This’ll probably consist of me saying “What’s the point” over and over again, but anyhow let’s play “Try Not to Get Brain Damage Watching Winnie the Pooh Meets Crash Bandicoot, part 1”.

• 0:51 PEOPLE LIKE THIS.
• 1:01 PEOPLE LIKE THIS.
• 1:35 Mickey’s House of Villains may have had a lot of villains from separate media in one film, but this is ridiculous.
• 2:11 Dat watermark. Makes you wish the guy who made this was intelligent to record his own games by camera or DVR, doesn’t it? Of course, if he were intelligent this video wouldn’t exist.
• 3:00 And this is exactly how fun the adventure’s going to be, folks.
• 3:40 What’s Bowser doing in a PlayStation game?
• 3:46 Wouldn’t King Koopa be a good enough alternative? Bowser has two captions at once.
• 3:49 Unless poor continuity saves the day.
• 4:16 So far, this sucks even as a YTP.
• 4:20 You know how sucky a video can be just from the utterly banal “you’re” confusion.
• 4:28 Prepare for an extreme lack of rhyming.

Several of the parts, including the beginning of this, have already been taken off of Dailymotion. This is the earliest part I could find of this, and even then it is muted for some reason. It’s hard to believe that there actually exists a direct-to-video Charlotte’s Web 2, now find out that there’s three goddamn “Adventures of"s of the same thing.