Heck No Pooh's Adventures

At least this isn’t a parody of The Lorax.

Thomas and Twilight Sparkle meets Father Christmas, part 3. Lest forget that part 1 had me witness the first ever subtitle goof-ups in the history of this blog.

• 0:07 At least we won’t be able to see Thomas and Twilight Sparkle’s Adventures of The Snowman. But if they tackle The Snowman and the Snowdog then I will be pissed.
• 0:26 So crossing a crooked bridge is supposed to be dancing?
• 1:09 Applejack tries her hardest at a British accent. And also, “Farther” Christmas can already see that! What do you think he is, stupid?
• 1:31 How would you know? You’re a train! *sigh* Cue the “what” montage…
• 2:06 Oops, watermark!
• 2:13 Wouldn’t they all fit in the sleigh? How are they running all the way from the North Pole to London?
• 3:33 *groans out loud* “Your” misuse? Check.
• 5:17 And now a song from Mickey’s Twice Upon a Christmas. That does not fix anything about the Disney logo being used!
• 6:02 Twilight’s singing it? In a male voice? Tut tut…
• 8:09 “Vioce”
• 8:22 He’s a brony, and he actually thinks she’s called “Railty”. Good Christ.
• 8:35 Pooh Footage? What Pooh footage?
• 8:37 Implying that everyone likes his videos.

• Overreactions: 
• Mistakes: 
• Lack of concern over Santa undressing: 
• Logic: What logic?
• Rabid Bronyism and Trainerism: 

Overall: 7/5

0.4/10. During this riff, I sent a message to the creator of these videos.

How are Thomas and his friends able to move like that? I mean, they are trains, so you wouldn’t expect them to move off the rails, or even fly in the air. Besides, how do they even get through the doors and fit in such a small area? I would like to know, because it has confused me ever since I started watching these kinds of videos.

I just hope he responds, because this is by far the most confusing crossover adventure video I’ve ever had the time to sit through. There are so many questions to be asked, so many errors that could have been corrected had the creator analysed his own work before uploading it, and a complete lack of Christmas spirit or respect towards the art of Raymond Briggs animation. Give me a blooming explanation, damn it!

Like Winnie the Pooh and the Dark Crystal, I watched the original before watching the butchered version, and while it ain’t The Snowman, it’s still one of the most unique visions of Santa Claus out there - a guy who has no elves, especially no trains or horses to help him. Just a couple of pets and a couple of reindeer. He ain’t jolly, but a wisecracking, globe-trotting geezer who can think up things to do for the fun of it before the big day. Unfortunately, these crossover people don’t believe in going solo, they fudge up who Father Christmas’ character was intended to be.

Well, enough ranting. Next time, we’re going to see how Benny and his pals got along in the middle of their adventures through Beauty and the Beast. And besides, I’ve seen that the creator of this video has added a part to his latest adventure where KP-ShadowSquirrel’s ponies help out the trains for 24¾ minutes.

(Source: poohadventures.wikia.com)

Thomas and Twilight Sparkle meets Father Christmas, part 2. Thomas and friends must have traveled on an awfully long track to get to the countries.

• 1:05 How’d you get through the door, though?
• 1:07 How did all of you get through? When Thomas and his friends are involved in a crossover adventure, you can’t help but question the logic.
• 1:34 Flippin’ heck. Expect a whole lot of rusting.
• 1:55 A grammatically incorrect person using “it’s” correctly? What sense does that make?
• 2:17 No you’re not, you’re still in Equestria.
• 2:40 Oh my goodness! A stylish dessert! Never seen anything like it!
• 3:20 Oh no! He’s got nothing left to gamble with! The scientists were right!
• 3:55 I’m going to bish bash bosh you someday.
• 4:28 How is that even a game, even by train standards?
• 5:08 How are those trains able to fly?
• 6:34 *reads the subtitles* You can say that again.
• 7:18 I was expecting a more extreme reaction. Jeez, you overreact to a bill and not a toy pony?
• 7:40 It’s the same reaction I used for this entire video!
• 8:48 It’s not Pooh’s Adventures, and yet we still have someone saying “bother”.
• 9:16 He’s Santa Claus! He is more capable than that!
• 10:22 He’s on a track and covered in Christmas lights. This still confuses me as to how he manages to get from one country to another!
• 12:08 A barrel. What an exciting present.
• 13:40 All you did was place a barrel somewhere it would be dangerous for kids to sleep in.

(Source: poohadventures.wikia.com)

Last time, we saw a train fanatic invade yet another episode of Phineas and Ferb. Today, we're looking at a bunch of blooming ponies and blooming trains invading Santa’s blooming privacy. Here, CGI trains and Flash-animated horses ruin the hand-drawn animated beauty of the Raymond Briggs adaptations. But how will the trains get to billions of homes all in one night? I know how Rainbow Dash would do it, but let’s stop complaining like this and start complaining at bits of Thomas and Twilight Sparkle meets Father Christmas, part 1.

• 0:00 Okay, I can understand the Disney logo appearing in Rarity’s Adventures of Amazing Animals, the original show being distributed by the Disney Channel and whatnot, but this?! Why?
• 0:32 Oh, God. He used the Cineworld jingle, didn’t he?
• 0:46 What I’m seeing isn’t very jungle-y.
• 1:48 At least he doesn’t use Movie Maker.
• 3:36 Especially with the horses and trains that are going to be stalking you.
• 3:57 So they are like celebrities in this universe? “their selfs”
• 4:16 How about a movie?
• 4:35 How can a train fit in a garden? Heck, Trainboy54 coming out of the closet as a small train made more sense!
• 4:40 “It sure has”? “HAS”?
• 4:46 Wouldn’t it make more sense to call him “Santa Claus”?
• 4:49 Why am I suddenly thinking dirty thoughts in this scene?
• 5:03 You should know, you've delivered toys of th- Oh, wait. 1991.
• 5:05 [link]
• 5:10 Jeez, Turdie F. Bastard puts more effort into positioning and scaling than you.
• 5:16 RARITY: They called me Railty because I’m friends with trains! How clever is that?
• 5:25 Oh God. I made fun of this in my own video before I could actually witness it!
• 5:30 What’s making this even more confusing is that apparently, he’s going to be using both British and American clips. Just imagine if he used both Mel Smith and William Dennis Hunt’s Santa.
• 5:35 SPIKE: And by that I mean Ratatouille!
• 5:39 That’s what I still hate about these videos - the guest stars turn the main character into a dumbass.
• 6:02 You didn’t answer his question correctly.
• 7:14 Calm down, it’s just a camper van painted in red.
• 7:31 Oh. Haven’t tackled that. Better do it then! Seriously though, did this guy even watch the video after he completed it?
• 8:17 The ponies’ situations fit more than the trains, mainly because the ponies are small and have legs.
• 8:39 [link]
• 9:26 No, that’s what happens when people get drunk.
• 9:41 Brown elephant, more like.
• 10:03 It’s a flashback. We get it.
• 10:49 WE GET IT.
• 11:09 Finally.
• 11:14 OF course he’s not listening. You’re speaking in blooming text.
• 11:30 What, did we see through Twilight’s eyes?
• 11:33 First they overreact to an RV, now they overreact to a bill that isn’t even theirs.
• 12:12 We still have yet until Thomas reacts to seeing Santa’s whole behind.
• 12:48 “Breafast” “hungery” This guy is British.
• 13:01 He can see that already. And if he mentioned HP Sauce, wouldn’t that mean the campers would be interested in seeing Thomas & Friends as well?
• 13:56 See? I told you their situations were relevant!

(Source: poohadventures.wikia.com)

Trainboy54’s Adventures of Phineas and Ferb Episode 57: Toy to the World, part 2. Jon’s ego is big as a… well, you know.

• 0:14 Talk about how slow you’re making this run!
• 1:05 All poor Trainboy was doing the whole time was staring at a blank piece of paper.
• 1:09 JON: I can’t After Effects myself in just yet, you know!
• 1:51 Thanks for interrupting a musical number like that!
• 2:07 SHOPKEEPER: Doesn’t the vomit say enough?
• 2:11 No. More like #3474579134924765236476325601432675363.
• 2:17 You dick.
• 2:24 Artistic talent!
• 2:28 JEREMY: And a train, which is kinda weird.
• 2:31 Ladies and gentlemen, Trainboy’s entire filmography.
• 2:36 How the hell did you turn into a train anyway?
• 2:57 PEOPLE LIKE THIS.
• 3:05 Actually, it’s free.
• 3:22 UNDAWEEARR
• 3:36 Yes, call him Jon. It sounds less ridiculous.
• 3:43 Another crossover?
• 4:21 Jon in a different location? How unusual!
• 4:25 I’ll show you how useful a brick can be if you don’t shut up.
• 4:40 Slow-paced jump cuts!
• 4:44 Did he just eat his own finger off?

• Platypus Trainboy: 
• Platypus Trainboy: 
• Platypus Trainboy: 
• Platypus Trainboy: 
• Platypus Trainboy: 

Overall: 5.8/5

-0.16/10. (No) Thanks to the Douchebag for sending me this. Tune in next time where I riff another train-related Christmas video, only it has ponies!

Of course the world didn’t end. And it isn’t going to be any different in 2017. But sometimes, I feel like the world already ended, and that’s where people like Trainboy54 come in. For as we’ll be able to celebrate Christmas in hopeful peace, we’ll be looking at his Christmas special which isn’t even based on a Christmas special, and has J.K. Simmons in it. Trainboy54’s Adventures of Phineas and Ferb Episode 57: Toy to the World, part 1.

• 0:00 Music from a franchise that has talking vehicles that can actually travel everywhere.
• 0:07 Boo! Booooooo!
• 0:15 Step away from the damn microphone.
• 0:18 NO.
• 0:35 It ain’t Ackley or Jon’s own singing, but it’s still stupid.
• 0:55 Who’s even singing in each voice?
• 2:42 He looks more like he’s passing gas than blowing smoke out of his head.
• 2:44 I said booooo.
• 3:07 Why would I?
• 3:43 Of course it had to be low quality. We wouldn’t want the copyright monsters getting him, would we? Would we?
• 4:10 CANDACE: *screams even harder*
• 4:18 I just thought of something - Jon sounds like Phineas crossed with his mother. Or Doofenshmirtz.
• 4:38 But not as good as trains, eh Trainboy?
• 4:49 Clearly implying that he can.
• 5:01 Like these videos!
• 5:15 We are again reminded how brutal Trainboy is when he ruins jokes.
• 5:35 Jeez, Trainboy, put your tripod to better use!
• 5:42 Boy, it must feel weird saying that.
• 5:46 TB has even less facial expressions than Ferb.
• 5:55 Manchildren count too, you know.
• 6:17 You know someone's embarrassing himself in front of the camera when the only thing he’s not doing is being JustinRPG.
• 6:32 Smiling ain’t that hard, Trainboy.
• 6:56 JON: I love celery!

fuck–no–my–little–pony:

How can a train fit in any room of a castle anyway?