Heck No Pooh's Adventures

I’ve re-uploaded the original cut of Pooh’s Adventures of Happy Days, just to help you remember what a mess it is.

It’s time for a short Benny, Leo and Johnny Adventure! I’ve been posting plenty of furry junk ever since BlackBuster took on the “Best Of” video, so I just thought I’d go back to riffing on the time-travelling lions. And boy, I can’t believe I never took this on before. In this short, they tarnish a classic that was made before the mouse we know and love started talking. Yes, they went that far. Benny, Leo and Johnny’s Adventures of Steamboat Willie.

• 0:02 They muffled the audio to try and make it sound old. Nope.
• 1:11 See what I mean?
• 1:45 Was that supposed to be a Ben Stiller impersonation?
• 2:01 Subtitles actually fit quite well in this period of time, even though this came from the sound era. I just wish they were all subtitled so I wouldn’t have to hear that Rafiki voice again.
• 2:02 Excuse me?!
• 2:04 Except the microphone output, that is.
• 2:18 Really?
• 2:21 For a while I’ve imagined Mickey as the president. I’ve also imagined time travel to be illegal in the Toon world.
• 2:50 And here comes one of Benny’s biggest cartoon crushes.
• 4:03 Jesus, Benny’s done some bad impersonations but Mickey just takes the cake!
• 4:07 Shouldn’t Alex be taking the mickey out of Mickey? I mean, just look at who made the Madagascar trilogy.
• 4:16 Bully? Having travelled through time with a bunch of two-legger lions, shouldn’t she tell the difference between bossing and bullying?
• 5:16 In case you forgot, Benny likes this kind of situation a lot. Then again…
• 5:36 Just because they’ve barely done anything for the past minute! Besides, Mickey could already hear so what’s the use?
• 5:44 Mickey’s a first mate, so he’s smarter than you may think.
• 6:19 Alex seems more than pleased after all that.
• 6:25 SIMBA: Stop that or you’ll be lion food!
• 7:49 Oh, Jesus.
• 7:53 PEOPLE LIKE THIS.
• 8:37 That is not, and I mean NOT, how you dance to 20’s music.
• 9:40 But you haven’t yiffed him yet!
• 9:42 This happens in pretty much every time travel journey they have.
• 9:47 Alex’s head may be big, but just look at this!

• Terrible impersonations: 
• Lack of contribution: 
• Inappropriate dancing: 
• Dumbing down: 
• Yiffing: 

Overall: 3.8/5

0.24/10. In this episode, we have learned that Leo’s time travel gizmo sucks, you always need to compare your voice to the original character before impersonating it, dialogue-free films should stay that way, and modern dance moves do not go with everything. Stay tuned for more furry crap, possibly even a full adventure video if I get any suggestions!

(Part Two here)

The Jon McDowell Self-Esteem Hour is brought to you by Dr. Phiebe’s Speech Therapy Institution.

Pooh’s adventures of Lego Pirates of the Caribbean the Video Game, part 7. I warned Reese to not make this thing drag on for hours. I advised him to cut out the boring bits. He just didn’t listen.

• 2:04 Desperation!
• 4:34 Some adventurers you are.

Pooh’s adventures of Lego Pirates of the Caribbean the Video Game, part 6. PEOPLE LIKE THIS.

• 1:02 This is the only crossover shot in the video. The rest is boring bullshit.

Pooh’s adventures of Lego Pirates of the Caribbean the Video Game, part 5. The villain meeting commences. Cue the evil laughter montage.

• 0:06 Why would they need an introduction like that when the villains already appeared so abruptly?
• 0:12 Smithers may not be very true to his character, but Reese sure got it better than EA did.
• 0:18 How can Reese even read that?
• 0:24 Again, why is he a villain? Because he cusses so much? Because he trashed the Power Rangers movie? I mean, he LOVES the Animaniacs, so why the hell is he evil in these videos?
• 0:34 Oh, what it would be like if AVGN Bugs was used as a reaction shot for Bugs himself.
• 0:50 Movie Maker is so weak it’s causing millisecond-long sound glitches when clips are muted.
• 0:55 Now Pinky and the Brain are villains? Wile E. I understand perfectly, but Pinky and the Brain? Just because they plot to take over the world, doesn’t mean they are legitimately sinister.
• 0:58 Jeez Louise, the splicing is so bad.
• 1:09 Is it so hard just to say “rule the Lego world?”
• 1:48 Well, at least we won’t have Reese explaining what happens next to the newcomers. Yet.
• 2:36 Finally, some new Bowser footage. And it still has its own captions! God damn!
• 2:48 I bet Reese had no problem at all playing Sonic the Glitch-hog.
• 2:59 Agh, I was wearing headphones!
• 3:05 Good thing there’s a Kraken in this game, or this would be completely ridiculous.

Pooh’s adventures of Lego Pirates of the Caribbean the Video Game, part 4. At least he didn’t cast Banana Bat.

• 1:28 Um… Fitting?
• 1:31 Not quite as much as having their faces scraped when trying to get all 10,000 of themselves down there.
• 3:04 Not a logical response to someone getting killed. At least Turdie put some sense into it.
• 3:15 You bet your animated asses you are, you stalkers.
• 3:45 ONE OF THE VILLAINS: Look! *points at Meowth’s forehead* Gold!
• 3:48 I dunno, it’s really quite a large amount.

Comments:

• “Nice job on part 4. I liked the part where our heroes went down the chimney.”

Pooh’s adventures of Lego Pirates of the Caribbean the Video Game, part 3. At least Yakko himself has some sort of regret about the amount of characters he casts!

• 1:13 How could he tell that early that he will have an adventure?
• 1:17 Reese must have a real hard-on for someone who only appeared in two episodes.
• 1:20 Just because multiple trips on the ride are fun doesn’t mean this is okay!
• 1:27 He’s busy having wet dreams of Numbuh 5 involving him in bondage.
• 1:36 Numbuh 5 making out with her real husband, a fat, smarter kid named Numbuh 2.
• 1:40 He was too horny to draw it better!
• 1:44 No he hasn’t. It’s his kink.
• 1:52 Dude, she didn’t even punch you.
• 1:58 STOP BREAKING THE FOURTH WALL. This is making Class of Nuke'Em High Part III look clever.
• 2:49 Just for staring at him?
• 3:53 Just because this stuff is fun when you’re playing it or at least taking guidance from it doesn’t mean it will be fun as a legitimate movie.

Pooh’s adventures of Lego Pirates of the Caribbean the Video Game, part 2. Let’s be glad he’s not tackling the movies themselves.

• 0:00 Still a better way to open a Pooh’s Adventure than the desert.
• 0:13 And also a perfect candidate for game-jumping jokes.
• 0:16 What makes this so bad already is that they actually mention that it already exists but they’re going to go on an adventure inside it anyway.
• 0:18 TIGGER: For a while, but YouTube busted our asses before we could meet a Jewish alien.
• 0:26 Another case of unreadable subtitles in the way!
• 0:30 Her expression suggests otherwise.
• 0:35 So what’s the point of this then?!
• 0:42 Oh goodness, Reese’s possessed by the Ghost of Blackbeard.
• 0:53 How on God’s great Earth is that worthy of any sort of punishment?
• 1:00 Originally it was going to be an S&M, but Reese remembered that it would lose him some subscribers.
• 1:02 Pfffffffft
• 1:06 Knocked off? Thanks, talking hands, now we have one less cast member!
• 1:20 I mean, really. What is the point? They’ve been talkative since LEGO Batman 2, after all.
• 2:26 
• 2:31 This makes just about as much sense as Jack Sparrow riding Mr. Incredible’s hoverboard.
• 2:35 No, he’s THE Captain Jack Sparrow. He should ask “How did you know my name” or something.
• 2:39 SKIP. It’s exactly half of the video anyway and carries on for a minute in the beginning of the third part.
• 3:37 Did he just call Captain Jack Sparrow “Banana Bat”?! (Yakko’s comment left me two things more to nitpick on)
• 5:28 “My n*cut off*

According to the creator:

i Don’t Know if i Can Cause i Worked So Hard on it i Hope you Understand.

The other teaser looks like this.