Heck No Pooh's Adventures

It’s time for a short Benny, Leo and Johnny Adventure! I’ve been posting plenty of furry junk ever since BlackBuster took on the “Best Of” video, so I just thought I’d go back to riffing on the time-travelling lions. And boy, I can’t believe I never took this on before. In this short, they tarnish a classic that was made before the mouse we know and love started talking. Yes, they went that far. Benny, Leo and Johnny’s Adventures of Steamboat Willie.

• 0:02 They muffled the audio to try and make it sound old. Nope.
• 1:11 See what I mean?
• 1:45 Was that supposed to be a Ben Stiller impersonation?
• 2:01 Subtitles actually fit quite well in this period of time, even though this came from the sound era. I just wish they were all subtitled so I wouldn’t have to hear that Rafiki voice again.
• 2:02 Excuse me?!
• 2:04 Except the microphone output, that is.
• 2:18 Really?
• 2:21 For a while I’ve imagined Mickey as the president. I’ve also imagined time travel to be illegal in the Toon world.
• 2:50 And here comes one of Benny’s biggest cartoon crushes.
• 4:03 Jesus, Benny’s done some bad impersonations but Mickey just takes the cake!
• 4:07 Shouldn’t Alex be taking the mickey out of Mickey? I mean, just look at who made the Madagascar trilogy.
• 4:16 Bully? Having travelled through time with a bunch of two-legger lions, shouldn’t she tell the difference between bossing and bullying?
• 5:16 In case you forgot, Benny likes this kind of situation a lot. Then again…
• 5:36 Just because they’ve barely done anything for the past minute! Besides, Mickey could already hear so what’s the use?
• 5:44 Mickey’s a first mate, so he’s smarter than you may think.
• 6:19 Alex seems more than pleased after all that.
• 6:25 SIMBA: Stop that or you’ll be lion food!
• 7:49 Oh, Jesus.
• 7:53 PEOPLE LIKE THIS.
• 8:37 That is not, and I mean NOT, how you dance to 20’s music.
• 9:40 But you haven’t yiffed him yet!
• 9:42 This happens in pretty much every time travel journey they have.
• 9:47 Alex’s head may be big, but just look at this!

• Terrible impersonations: 
• Lack of contribution: 
• Inappropriate dancing: 
• Dumbing down: 
• Yiffing: 

Overall: 3.8/5

0.24/10. In this episode, we have learned that Leo’s time travel gizmo sucks, you always need to compare your voice to the original character before impersonating it, dialogue-free films should stay that way, and modern dance moves do not go with everything. Stay tuned for more furry crap, possibly even a full adventure video if I get any suggestions!

It’s official, Pooh and his friends meet Jesus Christ himself.

Winnie the Pooh Meets Crash Bandicoot, part 14. The end! Or not, since the sequel hooks are so blatantly overstated.

• 0:16 You were begging for it, of course.
• 0:28 You absolute wimps.
• 0:55 Imagine how it must feel to say that. Wouldn’t “Thanks for your help, everyone” be enough?
• 1:17 And to make it even more boring, the credits are silent.
• 1:18 I just hope there’s no sequel.
• 1:28 But due to the bastards at Fox, it had to be the second weakest Batman film ever made.
• 1:37 Do I look like I enjoyed this?
• 1:53 That’s not how you begin a bonus ending.
• 2:17 I still don’t know what the hell’s going to happen next in this Batman thing, neither should I care. I’m glad Reese gave up when he made a part that contained neither Batman or Pooh Bear, but him facing off against internet reviewers.
• 2:26 Subliminal Angry German Kid?

• Shits not given when Aku Aku dies: 
• Desperation: 
• Evidence of no English classes: 
• Laziness: 
• Pointlessness: 

Overall: 11/5

-1.2/10. Not only are game-based Pooh’s Adventures videos the most pointless of all, they have some of the most questionable logic since any video involving trains. How would anyone following Crash be able to hop on all those platforms without failing to catch up, or even worse, dying? What’s also unbelievable is how so much praise could be given to a video where even the character names are misspelt, characters barely make any appearance and villains give up just so they can be in the next adventure. What sort of entertainment value is provided from these videos? What? Besides, it seems that Reese also took on Kirby 64 recently. PEOPLE LIKE THIS.

Proof that people like this:

• “Nice ending.”
• “Will you please do the The New Adventures of Winnie the Pooh intro style for the rest of the Crash Bandicoot trilogy and download some Goofy Hollers and Wilhelm screams and put them into the rest of the films?
• "This is the best thing evur!”
• “This is the best thing evur!”
• “that was the best thing ive seen in my entigre lyfe plz do 1 with homstock!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
• “This is the best thing evur!”

The first two bullet points are not sarcasm.

Winnie the Pooh Meets Crash Bandicoot, part 13. Reese also made Pooh’s Adventures of Donkey Kong Country. Be thankful that’s just the TV show.

• 0:30 This is Pooh’s Adventures. POOH’S Adventures.
• 0:40 Actually, isn’t Buddy Bear standing right in front of you?
• 1:01 Pooh stopped sitting on his fuzzy ass and actually defeated a villain. At last.
• 1:14 We got to see a new reaction shot for Pooh Bear, and yet Tigger still remains the same. Thankfully, this part was made in July…
• 2:16 Finally.
• 3:51 With some emphasis on “Fimiliar”.
• 4:23 Except the only action we’ll be able to see is Crash attacking Cortex, and a fan trying to hump the computer screen has hard as he can.
• 4:37 The beginnings of exciting action scenes and we don’t even get to seem them.
• 4:47 Really, Reese?

Winnie the Pooh Meets Crash Bandicoot, part 12. One comment asks, “When’s the Phantom Blot gonna show up?” That’s right, when is he going to show up?

• 0:06 Crash ain’t stupid, you know, he’s just patient. Well, except when he did that random dance, that is.
• 0:35 Is this kid even trying with the subtitles?
• 1:34 Why doesn’t every enemy surprise them? Why don’t they get excited about two-legger that gets in the way?
• 2:17 And why don’t any of those minions surprise them the first time? People like this, I tell you.
• 2:47 Footage taken from an existing Pooh’s Adventure, and not even in terms of flashbacks. Not this again.
• 2:59 Gasping montage.
• 3:04 Another plot hole - they forgot to introduce Scooby-Dum.
• 3:13 Okay, it’s official - this kid didn’t watch The Thief and the Cobbler at all.
• 3:33 At last, a supporting villain actually does something, even if he’s trying to kill a cobbler!
• 3:36 Wait, he lost just because he missed? People these days…
• 3:48 I couldn’t even get so pissed off about the lack of colons until now.
• 4:52 [link]
• 5:05 How about you get them? God, the magicians in this video are so stupid…

Winie the Pooh Meets Crash Bandicoot, part 11. That’s not how villains work.

• 0:33 How about you all get him?
• 1:18 Shouldn’t they all be shot? Not every one of them could hide that easily.
• 1:42 Translation: “Use the flashlight! I have magic breath and I’m too afraid to use it!”
• 1:46 *drinks again*
• 1:56 Well, the Duke actually got to use his breath for once.
• 2:01 Horray for the annoying kitten!
• 2:03 *drinks yet again* Forget it, every single one of these characters has only one general reaction shot.
• 2:27 At last, new Bowser footage, even if it’s still captioned.
• 2:34 So apparently, watching a fight ensue is making them tougher.
• 2:39 This is just getting worse than Pooh’s Adventures of The Magic Voyage and How the Grinch Stole Christmas combined.
• 2:48 Did this kid even watch The Thief and the Cobbler? Any version?
• 3:10 
• 3:26 
• 3:35 
• 4:05 Hard to see through the rain? Well, that explains everything.

Winnie the pooh Meets Crash Bandicoot, part 10. “i Got Permission to do this”

• 0:06 Finally, a comment that’s actually rather important.
• 0:13 That’s not how believing actually works.
• 0:42 The only thing worse than Cortex’s minions is this.
• 0:53 You heard Mario earlier ago, Crash! Don’t forget the apples!
• 1:21 Or are you?
• 1:46 Didn’t one of them already hurt him?
• 2:06 And wait until you see the platforms before you actually talk about them.
• 2:29 Because Reese couldn’t find a better gameplay video.
• 3:10 Judging from the caption above him, he seems rather happy about it.
• 3:20 But those last subtitles were slightly more readable!
• 3:51 A question that could’ve been asked in the past 20 levels.
• 3:54 And Pooh isn’t listed in the “Idiots” category?
• 4:11 Something that could’ve been said 10 seconds ago.
• 4:37 A complete waste of a guest appearance.
• 5:45 *drinks*
• 5:56 The Grand Duke can breathe magic and turn into a tornado. Why the hell would he enforce himself to get defeated?

Proof that people like this:

• “"Pooh: Probably a dump of honey. Everyone: POOH!!! Pooh: What?” lol We know Pooh bear, he always think of honey. Oh no! Pinstripe’s a madman! Watch out!“
• "Nice job on part 10, Reese. And nice to referemce to Pooh and Ash’s Adventures of Scooby-Doo and the Headless Horseman of Halloween eventhough I haven’t even finished it yet. And when will you make part 11?”
• “I like the refrence to Pooh and Ash’s Adventures of Scooby-Doo and the Headless Horseman of Halloween too. I think it’s one of the most popular films of the Pooh’s Adventures series.”
• “*mass roleplaying*”
• “did you deliberately not make crash jump so that it could be part of the story or was it an accident?”

Well, if you noticed the damn watermarks in the previous 9 parts then you’d pretty much get a hint.

Winnie the Pooh Meets Crash Bandicoot, part 9. At last, no watermark. And decent sync, too.

• 0:01 CORNEDDY GULL.
• 0:03 No. How many times am I gonna keep seeing that?
• 0:06 A bit of times?
• 0:25 Hello? They’re burning pipes! Why wouldn’t he be aware?
• 0:41 (see 1:44, part 4)
• 0:53 Crash already ate everything available.
• 1:30 [link]
• 2:16 DesPEOPLE LIKE THIS!
• 2:22 RABBIT: Stop dancing, Crash, or we’ll make this even longer for you!
• 2:33 “oh d*cut off* (see 2:16)
• 4:10 And now we finally see the helmet of a Ranger who isn’t Red.
• 4:21 The editing is so bad that even spoken and subtitled lines have poor grammar.
• 4:28 MAY FROM POKEMON: You called?
• 5:30 Come on. How was that mask not worthy of any commentary?