Heck No Pooh's Adventures

Pooh’s Adventures of Mr. Meaty: Moochmaster P., part 2. As I breathe a sigh of relief after months of working on the Adventures video to end all Adventures videos, I can get back to riffing proof that not even that video helps.

• 0:18 That’s right, Piglet. Horror.
• 0:19 You bunch of illogical wimps.
• 0:22 The consequences of a 10 year old KND member making out with an over-13?
• 0:36 Turns out even puppets are capable of making bad crossovers by themselves.
• 0:54 This is going to result in some extremely poor cinematography.
• 0:59 Because webcams make even worse horror films than those shot on handheld.
• 1:14 Because Reese can’t provide any more footage to save his life.
• 1:23 Aaagh! There’s nothing scarier than cartoon clips that aren’t meant to be there.
• 2:13 *muffled* Acting.
• 2:28 Stop making what isn’t even that funny boring.
• 3:37 [link]
• 4:00 Speaking of food, why is her head a fish?
• 4:03 Mwa mwa mwaaaaah.
• 4:23 Reese commented on my parody by defending his “girlfriend”. Hell, I draw a fictional me with an original, fictional girlfriend and yet I know the meaning of virginity.
• 4:26 Why would Numbuh 5 want to go out with anyone over the age of 13, or anyone who keeps picking their nose in public?
• 4:30 Again, GODZILLA IN A FAST FOOD RESTAURANT.
• 4:52 CLIFFORD THE BIG RED DOG IN A FAST FOOD RESTAURANT.
• 5:16 So apparently that burger triggers an ice cream flood when eaten.
• 5:44 How is he supposed to already know what “mooch” means?
• 5:49 PEOPLE LIKE THIS.
• 6:06 Kinda forgot they were there. Laziness ahoy.
• 6:59 [link]
• 7:08 [link]
• 7:12 Says the guy picking his nose on camera.

Told you that dancing raccoon toy would get the part.

Winnie the Pooh in Star Wars again? That could only be used as a negative parody of Disney's acquisition of Lucasfilm. But no, he’s doing it again, and it’s up on YouTube, only it’s Lego. And it’s the hi-def video game. Yes, they’re taking on another video game, and it’s from the era where these minifigures could only speak gibberish. If it’s all gibberish, keep it gibberish, as having guest stars speaking in perfect English will not make sense especially in a Star Wars remake. Unfortunately, the douchebags who teamed up on Pooh’s Adventures of Happy Days were stupid enough to make this happen, in a double bill no less. So, without further ado, we begin this double bill with a puppet show, or so it was intended to be. Pooh’s Adventures of Mr. Meaty: Moochmaster P, part 1.

• 0:08 I already can tell that this thing’s badness is going to be quite similar to Phoenix Games’ Dingo releases.
• 0:34 Because the PS3 has too big a menu screen.
• 0:46 Screw that bit. He couldn’t even find footage from The Complete Saga.
• 2:00 I just hope Yakko’s not reading this when I say that if he’s crazy enough he could turn Slap T. Pooch into another crossover slave.
• 2:18 You already showed a Nickelodeon logo, what’s the point of showing another?! 
• 3:45 That logo sequence lasted 3¾ minutes. Further evidence of Yakko never caring how long anything is.
• 4:04 WALDORF: Hey, the frog’s not saying anything! Have I gone deaf?  STATLER: You probably have. Can I join in?
• 4:24 All those clips Reese has of Regular Show, and the best you could find is a still image.
• 5:10 It’s Jetta’s husband!
• 5:49 The Heffalump hunt again? This should be used more often, instead of that stupid desert scene.
• 6:03 Even though it’s still outdoors in the Hundred Acre Wood.
• 6:07 Did Yakko take footage from his own video and paste it into this, instead of just copying from one MSWMM to another? Lazy git.
• 6:09 Reese, who turned into some chubby kid with a monocle.
• 6:15 POOH: Nothing!
• 6:22 If you all got jobs, then everyone currently working would be out of business.
• 6:26 
• 6:32 Apart from Disney, that is.
• 6:40 So you got fired?
• 6:55 Good thing Patrick’s in decent character.
• 7:10 
• 7:20 It’s Little Godzilla’s wife!
• 7:34 You have a camera, Reese. Do more than just combine subtitles with actual voices.
• 7:38 Really, it isn’t that hard.
• 7:49 Judging from the clip that came before, that’s not how these Oobi guys talk.
• 7:52 …Wha?
• 7:53 Uh, you do know that Reese used the actual Simpsons in his recent video, right?
• 8:11 Effort?
• 8:41 Didn’t Poky say his name in the same footage Shy did?
• 8:59 “You know who else isn’t going to play a very big part in this? My Mom!”
• 9:15 For my parody, I actually found a clip where Fred says his and Barney’s names. It isn’t that hard if you put “I’m Fred Flintstone” in quotes on Google.
• 9:38 He went as far as to take footage from a parody.
• 10:11 This introduction scene has lasted over 3 minutes. Cut it out, Yakko. Just cut it out.
• 10:40 JOSH AND PARKER: Pfffffff ha ha hahahahahahaha!
• 11:16 There are so many characters here that I doubt all of them would hear what they’re saying.
• 11:34 This guy is a puppy! Walking on four legs! How the hell is he supposed to be a good fry cook?
• 12:17 Good thing Yakko never forgets his characters, unlike the last double bill.
• 13:24 Here’s another case of giant monsters in a bloody restaurant.
• 13:36 Joke ruined by out-of-character dancing.

Proof that people like this:

• “I love this.”
• “Wow. Looks like it took you a long time to make this.”
• “Not bad, boys. Not bad.”
• “Awesome Job, This Video Always Make Me Laugh.”
• “mr. meaty? that’s awsome i watch that show for years it’s awsome”
• “Not bad. I also liked it when Squidward is quilty after saying he respects the microphone at the Krusty Krab when he actually doesn’t.”

Note 4: Please forgive me for making this intro 9 minutes long.

Pooh’s Adventures of Frogs, part 8. Did you know at all that my brain just imploded?

• 0:01 Las Vegas? Do I still have to keep asking questions?!
• 0:07 YouTube, you just made a mistake worse than the worst updates you’ve put onto this site.
• 0:35 I’ll just refer to this guy as Jerr Meredith to annoy him.
• 1:24 Jerr, is that the best picture of Owl you could possibly find?
• 1:52 John Goodman? As the frog prince?
• 1:59 I heard more than one actor/actress playing each of these characters.
• 2:13 I’m still pissed that Francis was also played by Chris Harley.
• 2:20 He never even used these images in the first place!
• 2:48 I thought Joan Rex was a realistic lizard. And a girl!
• 2:55 Really? I’m hearing quite a bit of Klaus Badelt here.
• 4:05 And the test audience lost all concept of reality.
• 4:19 And hundreds of other characters taking the original cast’s places!
• 5:57 Which Romeo and Juliet, though? Leonard Whiting & Olivia Hussey? Leonardo DiCaprio & Claire Danes? The seals?
• 6:04 What prince?
• 6:11 Nasty Jack, a.k.a. Captain Frax.

I advised the creator of these videos to mute any clip he subtitles, and he remembered that for the future. However, when I advised him to use the right clips for the characters, he said that it’s about the frog attitude more than the appearance.

Bullfrog.

• Lack of Kermit: 
• Lack of frog footage: 
• Laziness: 
• Questions to ask: 
• Brain cancer: 

Overall: 11/5

-1.2/10. This is so confusing it makes Cloud Atlas look quite simple. Who’s a frog? Who’s fighting who? Who’s talking to who? Who’s serving what purpose? What’s Pooh Bear up to? This guy could’ve used any frog footage, like Swing Wedding, Demetan Croaker, Michigan J. Frog cartoons, Freddie as F.R.O.7, the Frogger cartoon, Frogger gameplay, The Princess and the Frog, and especially Kermit. Really, Kermit was a pirate in Muppet Treasure Island! You could’ve had the chance, but instead you had to go with clips from Black Sheep and Spaceballs! The guy who made this speaks fine English, but that’s nothing to overcome his flawed logic when he made this video. And who did he even think John Goodman was? Emperor Kuzco? Well, I’ll start riffing another crossover once I get back from osteopathy. Until then.

Pooh’s Adventures of Frogs, part 7. Did you know at all that I’ve been asking you nearly 70 questions?

• 0:01 Who are the hyenas supposed to be? This a story about bloody frogs!
• 0:38 Really, why are they fish now? Is this just because the owner of the Thug Tug has an eyepatch?
• 1:06 Really, who died? And is crappy VHS quality the best you could film?
• 1:42 Now that’s a frog. But who’s the fairy?
• 1:59 I was hoping he’d remain a frog instead of turning into a lion and an alien.
• 2:14 So… that’s the magic carpet, right?
• 3:27 Surprise lizard!
• 4:04 And not even Joan Rex was a frog.
• 4:34 They saved Camelot and not Wartropolis?
• 5:09 Notice how the titles look like they were filmed.
• 5:24 Buzz was David Spade, and now he’s a fucking bird.
• 5:28 Say, what were his friends doing for the past 5½ minutes?
• 5:31 Just frogs? You’re also humans, fairies, lions, mice, aliens…
• 6:23 …always make sure clips are muted when they’re subtitled, and when making a crossover story involving a certain species, make sure you use one character at a time!

Here’s the exciting conclusion to Pooh’s first Jam adventure! There will be more episodes later, and remember, if you don’t like it, it’s your own fault.

Nope. It’s yours.

Pooh’s Adventures of Frogs, part 6. Did you know at all that there is an anime called The Brave Frog?

• 0:09 I assume that those two mice are supposed to be Pooh and Tigger.
• 0:14 The guy from the Felix the Cat movie? I thought the villain was Rasputin among many other characters!
• 1:19 I don’t think that cursor seems too happy to be involved.
• 1:31 Oh, no! A hole! That is actually a different cave!
• 1:36 You already found Christopher Robin.
• 2:23 Abu and Aladdin? What are they doing here? Then again, what the hell is everyone doing here?
• 2:53 A magic carpet now? What is up with this story?
• 3:55 The blinds are my favourite characters by far.
• 4:44 Indiana bloody Jones. Ugh…
• 4:48 Snakes? What s*obligatory repeated Pooh reaction shot*
• 4:52 And now he’s using Harry Potter.
• 6:10 Chicken Little? Why?
• 6:20 Are they just reaa[tr;mwes touslwa u,rcqw,u3towli,q4iuál, ctwqk5cthwaq2
• 6:35 Why do I have to keep asking so many questions?!
• 6:58 It never works, Pooh. It’s no use.
• 7:04 You used actual Thumbelina footage earlier ago. Why take a low-quality image now?
• 7:39 Wait, they’re still pirates?
• 8:09 And the princess is a boy again.
• 8:42 And a lion again. Seriously, who’s talking?
• 10:49 No you didn’t. An alien did.

Pooh’s Adventures of Frogs, part 5. Did you know at all that the rest of Muppet Treasure Island had a frog in pirate attire?

• 0:00 Pirates of the Carribean? How many people do they have on board this blasted ship?
• 0:52 My face while watching this.
• 1:18 The whole problem was resolved using a clip from Spaceballs.
• 1:22 Yes, Pooh Bear. Where HAVE you been?
• 1:29 We still have 12 minutes and 20 seconds left of this part, and three more parts after that. So what the hell will happen next?
• 1:38 Yes, the princess is now a lion.
• 1:40 That’s Timon and Pumbaa, you confused asshole!
• 2:00 Oh, how this story would sound in context…
• 5:02 So… who died again?
• 5:45 They’re mice now? This is a story about frogs! FROGS! Frogs do not have fur!
• 6:07 Really, who died?
• 6:20 Lilly’s a boy?
• 6:40 [link]
• 7:33 Now he’s using clips from Atlantis, just because Milo says “murder of the royal family”.
• 8:21 And after four parts and 8:21 minutes, we finally get a Paw and Order running gag.
• 8:43 Captains can be friendly and perfectly wonderful, you know.
• 9:03 Christopher Robin’s become much less British since Pooh found him.
• 9:23 The princess is a boy, and Captain Frax is a woman. I really hate this.
• 9:39 Another case of failed subtitling continuity.
• 9:47 Eek! Something that’s not actually scary!
• 9:52 Would it make sense to film gameplay and cutscenes in Frogger instead of badly placing images of Frogger and the original Lily?
• 9:56 And now another sign of laziness in picture choice - Frogger looks different, he’s right behind Lily, and his eye is glitched.
• 10:15 D'oh, just as it was exposing her eyes.
• 10:20 Someone breaking the fourth wall on Pooh Bear? That’s against the law!
• 10:24 Look who’s talking.
• 10:30 
• 11:11 I see badly recorded footage from a lousy Disney cash-in.

Pooh’s Adventures of Frogs, or should I say, Pooh’s Adventures of an Assortment of Muppets, Good Animation and Stupid Live-Action Comedies, part 4. Did you know at all that Frogger used to be a cartoon?

• 0:00 Wartropolis is that spaceport from Treasure Planet now?!
• 0:34 And now the frogs are aliens. Good God, video…
• 2:10 Now the pun doesn’t make much sense!
• 2:54 We can already tell she’s a cat person.
• 3:11 You forgot to subtitle that damn introduction.
• 4:08 The guy who created this video must think he’s created one epic adventure.
• 4:57 Pocahontas. Of course.
• 5:08 How many ships are there?
• 6:33 So the princess is now that girl from The Rescuers?
• 6:41 This isn’t a movie! It’s someone changing the channel!
• 7:26 The cowboys turned into fish.
• 7:30 But who blew them?
• 7:37 The Parent Trap? Now, I’ve seen some good crossovers mixing both animation and live-action movies together to make a story. This is doing it wrong. Who’s supposed to be talking?
• 7:49 Finally, actual cartoon frog footage.
• 8:13 No! No Home on the Range bunny rabbit!
• 8:27 No, no! No more Pocahontas footage! I want Ian McKellen as he appeared in Flushed Away!
• 9:01 Can anyone help me explain this entire story?
• 11:03 So the princess is Pocahontas?

Pooh’s Adventures of Frogs, part 3. Did you know at all that there is a movie called The Princess and the Frog?

• 0:11 Talk about a Blind Owl.
• 1:03 He’s been kidnapped!
• 2:09 All I can follow from this video is Anastasia’s parents have been cursed, Mulan is gone and Christopher Robin’s friends believe that he’s gone missing when he’s really gone somewhere else.
• 3:33 This is the second Pooh’s Adventure I’ve seen that introduces Pooh using footage from The Search for Christopher Robin, and yet this one sucks even more.
• 3:59 Good thing this is meant to be an original story, otherwise I’d be screaming with rage at these musical numbers.
• 5:28 Two people actually believe that is not Skull.
• 6:26 Did I forget to mention how poor the frame rate has suddenly become?
• 6:57 
• 7:05 Ladies and gentlemen, the making of a Pooh’s Adventure.
• 7:13 Through the middle of this part I advised the creator to mute when subtitling, and just because he took that advice doesn’t mean I should stop riffing.
• 7:24 THESE PEOPLE ARE SUPPOSED TO BE AN INSECT AND A ROYAL FROG.
• 7:45 THESE PEOPLE ARE SUPPOSED TO BE AN INSECT AND A ROYAL FROG.
• 8:02 DAVID SPADE AND CHRIS FARLEY ARE SUPPOSED TO BE AN INSECT AND A ROYAL FROG.
• 8:18 You had to wait until then to use actual frog pictures?
• 8:23 Ah, a true sign of pure laziness. Did you know at all that Winnie the Pooh has more than one movie, not to mention a whole franchise?
• 8:30 Good grammar and extremely poor editing do not mix.
• 8:43 THIS GUY WAS A CHARACTER IN BLACK SHEEP.
• 8:59 You did know, yet you could only use images for the conversation? [link]
• 9:00 These frogs are very strange beings, I tell you.
• 9:09 Now Francis and Buzz are the two guys from Disney’s Around the World in 80 Days? [link]
• 9:28 Oh dear, I’m getting a TheNewStoryteller vibe here…
• 9:57 Despicable Me? What the hell kind of adventure is this supposed to be?
• 9:59 So Wartropolis is in Egypt now?
• 10:02 Not even the visuals are fooling anyone.
• 10:20 Is Mulan the princess now?
• 10:25 Where is Wartropolis anyway? Russia? China? America? Britain? Egypt? China? [link]
• 10:38 He finally used the reaction shot from Pooh’s Heffalump Movie, and that’s still irritating.
• 10:40 Who’s the cow supposed to be?
• 11:04 What’s with the Muppet Treasure Island song? Who’s the boy supposed to be?
• 11:53 Who are Gonzo and Rizzo supposed to be?

Pooh’s Adventures of Frogs, part 2. Did you know at all that there is a movie called Freddie as F.R.O.7?

• 0:26 We know that’s Anastasia, you dumbshit. Stop screwing with history even harder! (No offence to Anastasia)
• 1:53 I said MUTING. This has so much failed subtitling it makes that Father Christmas video look clean.
• 2:50 Don’t you mean Captain Frax?
• 3:51 WORST SUBTITLING EVER.
• 4:57 Huh? Another movie?
• 5:00 Oh. A real Disney movie. (No offence to Anastasia) Isn’t this supposed to be about pirates?
• 5:04 Two fathers? Ana- I mean, Lilly, must be one odd princess.
• 5:36 End of movie confusion, back to reason as to why things like this get made confusion.
• 6:43 I might have to say it all the way through, but what is supposed to be going on here?

Well, camcorders have been used in LP’s, and previous Pooh’s Adventures functioned like LP’s, so it was inevitable that we had a camcorder Pooh’s Adventures.

Frogs? You mean the B-movie where a town is infested by a swarm of killer frogs? Eh, I could’ve already imagined that Pooh would take on horror. *reads the description* … Captain Frax? Princess Lilly? Wartrop- *searches for the names listed*

You managed to think up your own characters, whoever you are, and yet the best you could do with them was make the whole thing a Pooh’s Adventure. Well, while the guy who submitted this already reviewed it, the same thing happened with Pooh’s Adventures of Happy Days. Let’s riff, not just analyse, Pooh’s Adventures of Frogs, part 1.

• 0:00 Oh great, it’s already suffering from disneyJSman syndrome.
• 0:23 Childish Disney logo! Boo!
• 0:31 Two logos from WETA Digital in a row. Peter Jackson would be so ashamed.
• 1:09 Ironic how a logo commonly seen in educational programs could appear in something so brainless.
• 1:40 You don’t see this everyday in a Pooh’s Adventure. I’ll give him that.
• 2:05 Actually, they’ve flown spaceships and battled giant monsters. Would they count as the greatest?
• 8:27 And now that tender moment from the beginning of Pooh’s Grand Adventure is butchered by the opening of Muppet Treasure Island, and the creator was clearly too lazy to cover up the opening credits.
• 8:44 PEOPLE LIKE THIS.
• 8:51 Your Star Wars opening crawl isn’t fooling anyone but the idiots who like these videos.
• 9:13 Couldn’t even film it directly from the movie, huh?
• 9:27 Kermit’s going to be involved, isn’t he? I sure hope so.
• 11:23 It exploded us all the way to Russia.
• 11:38 So how did Pooh go back all those years?
• 11:43 MUTING. It isn’t that hard. Also, that’s a very badly place subtitle. Also, it appears that Russia is populated by frogs. Also, apparently those people are supposed to be frogs. Also, people like this.

The entire cast of the least logical crossover adventure series ever made.

(Source: poohadventures.wikia.com)